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Public Masturbators

ok guys can you TRY to be a little more discrete??

Man caught furiously masturbating in a supermarket was genuinely surprised to be seen

An Oklahoma man who was arrested for masturbating in the middle of a supermarket said he was was genuinely surprised people had seen him.

Police received a call at around 12:45pm on Saturday from two Walmart customers who had seen Derek Bennett nonchalantly strolling around the store with his penis out, masturbating.

Though shocked shoppers told security, the 26-year-old managed to finish up and leave the store before the police arrived.

Officers chased Bennett in their patrol car and pulled him over.

According to KRMG TV, the man immediately admitted to exposing himself when in custody, but was genuinely surprised that he had been spotted.

He faces multiple counts of indecent exposure.

The real question of course is why Walmart?

Perhaps because it was a Walmart ‘Tire and Lube Express’ (I’m not even joking – that’s what it’s called).

This incident comes just a fortnight after a man was sentenced for playing with himself in libraries while clutching a cucumber.

OMG are you a Cucumber Masturbator??

Yes, it is possible to love cucumber too much lol


Serial cucumber masturbator sentenced after being recognised in library


A judge has sentenced a man who was seen masturbating in a public library while holding a cucumber – and it wasn’t for the first time.

Fredrick Tennyson Davis, 49, was at the Agincourt Library in Toronto, Canada, on 31 May when he was spotted by staff.

Library employees recognised the man from the last time he had been caught in flagrante delicto with a salad item after he was seen carrying out the same lewd act in the library back in April.

Constable David Hopkinson of the Toronto Police Service revealed that subtlety was not Mr Davis’ strong suit.

‘On April 7, he sits down and a 26-year-old woman sits next to him and he opens up his laptop,’

The man then started masturbating with one hand while clutching a cucumber with the other, Hopkinson said.

Mr Davis was charged with an indecent act and two counts of failure to comply with probation. York Regional Police Constable Andy Pattenden revealed that Mr Davis was charged with a similar act back in June 2012 at a different library.

It isn’t known whether Mr Davis recycles the cucumbers or uses a fresh one each time.

The judge handed down a suspended sentence and 12 months probation to the man.

When pressed as to whether Mr Davis had posed a threat to library staff, Constable Hopkinson remarked:

‘I don’t think he had any free hands to make a threat.’



Do you have Male PMS?

Male PMS = Pathetic Masturbator Syndrome


It is an incurable chronic, progressively degenerative condition. You can
only learn to accept it in your lives, and deal with its consequences.

Constant masturbating.


Thats why you need ME : )

I encourage masturbating, and eating cum, and anything that makes you get even worse into your addiction.

Its so much fun to be a wanker isnt it?

Now go sit in your little masturbation chair.. i know you all have a favorite one.. lol.. and buy a couple of my goody bags, and jerk off for me.


I still dont have enough pics that you all have cummed on! I want to make a whole new page of just pics that have been splattered on. So print your favorite one out, and splatter your splooge! Send it to me so I can start collecting them! Be a good boy and just do it.



hello naughty wankers

do any of you get a hard on when you see someone holding a wooden spoon… because you used to get spanked with one? Just curious!


If so, maybe you should get one and call me so we can re live it, spank your bottom for me till its nice and pink, you have been naughty and you know you deserve it!!!




Contest Winner

The winner of the fave fantasy contest that was held in December is Happy!

Here is his entry.. and Happy.. you have email



The Contest

Conny picks up the phone and greets me with her usual, sexy voice. “Hello. I have a special treat in store for you today.”

“Fuck,” I think to myself with apprehensive excitement, “I’m already at the edge of my limits.”

“OK, Conny”, I say, “What do you require of me?”

“Get on cam first and I will explain it to you.” She says.

Reluctantly, I fired up the camera and immediately Conny said to me “Good boy! Now that I have you on cam, let me explain the ground rules of the contest.”

“Contest?” I managed to choke out of my now seemingly parched throat.

“Yes. Today you’re going to compete on cam with another caller. The rules are simple. The first of you to cum into a shot glass is safe. The last one to finish must guzzle all of their sweet cum down… On cam, of course, so this way I can make sure you eat it all. Now, no touching your cock until I say so. If the loser fails to eat his cum, his pic goes on my site – as per the usual rules!”

“Yes, Conny,” I murmur, astonished to myself that I’m somehow being dragged into something I didn’t expect.

Moments later, my Skype buzzes with the sound of a second incoming call from another person. I’m instructed by Conny to answer it. When I do it, another man looking just as astonished as me is sitting in front of his webcam. Very quickly, the competitive streak in me grabs hold and I think to myself “I can do this. I can win.” On the other end of the cam, I’m sure he was thinking the same thing.

Conny then instructs both of us to keep our hands visible and off our cocks until she says so. We both do as instructed and despite our excitement, the apprehension and nervousness we both feel is forcing us both to become flaccid without being able to touch ourselves. After one or two minutes, it appears that we’re both pretty soft and suddenly Conny says “GO!”

My hand reaches my cock in no time and I immediately begin stroking. My opponent does the same. Meanwhile, Conny is cheering us on and making mock humiliating statements towards us. I could sense I wasn’t becoming hard as fast as my opponent. He appeared to be fully erect while I was only semi-rigid.

But, suddenly, Conny tells me I better not lose or I’ll be her little cum slut today. Something about that fires me up and I have a raging hard cock at that point. My foe and I are stroking so fast, our cams turn our arms and hands into big blurs. Finally, after just a short time, I feel that familiar pressure building up in my cock. “I’m going to win,” I think to myself. I grab a hold of the shot glass and in mere seconds I’m spurting my load into the glass. I look up at the screen, barely oblivious of my orgasm just making sure that I’m about to win and I see my opponent grabbing for his. But, it’s too late for him. I’ve won. My proud loud is sitting in the bottom of the shot glass and I hold it up for Conny to see just as my enemy is shooting his load.

I see the look of exasperation come across his face because he knows what’s next. Conny congratulates me on a job well done and tells me I am to stay around to watch the festivities. My opponent sits in front of the camera and tells me “Good job, man. This sucks.” Conny is enjoying our predicament very much and kind of giggles with happiness. She tells him, “You know what’s next, right?” He says, “Yes.”

“Good,” Conny says. “Now before you eat all that yummy cum, I want you to wait a good minute just to make sure you’ve calmed down enough.”

I think to myself how difficult that’s going to be. It’s one thing to eat your own load right after cumming but to wait a solid minute would be nearly impossible. But, I’ll give credit where credit is due… My foe waited the full minute and when Conny told him it was time he drank it all down like a good cum slut.

Afterward, we all bid one another adieu and the game and night was over.

Days later, I decided to check Conny’s blog to see if any information about the little contest was on her site. When I went to the site, I saw my naked face and body plastered on the front page of her site. The headline read “Contest Loser!”

My face became red and flush with embarrassment. “Surely there must be some mistake? I know I won the contest!” I think to myself. I read the description of the days events and everything seemed so accurate. So, how did such a thing happen?

At the very bottom of the blog entry I see a little note written to me. “Everyone who gets on cam for Conny eats! Those who don’t know the price they’ll pay.”

Be a Good Boy and Visit My Friends!